Why is it that we come up with excuses?

Why is it that we have opportunities that exist in life and we always try to justify to ourselves why it’s not going to work?

There’s one key reason why we keep coming up with excuses and we keep trying to justify why its not going to work.  

To start with, I want to put a big call out to the person that inspired my inner self, my subconscious and then really resonated with this message.

And that person is Preston Smiles.

And here’s the thing,  I was listening to this podcast and Preston shared a message.   And he said there is a saying that he lives by.  And I tell you what.

This is something that has stuck and has resonated with me.

And the reason is has resonated with me – is because as an investment strategic coach, I spend so much time one on one with clients who want to get to that next level of investing.

And the reason they want to get to that next level of investing is because they want to have a life.  They want to be with their family.  They want to have experiences.

They don’t want to be fearful.  They don’t want to be living their life thinking “I don’t know if this is possible”.

And Preston said this:

“Love will find a way, everything else will find and excuse.”  

And that I reckon my friends is one of the key reasons why, if you want to take your financial investing to that next level, I’d suggest you want to do it for the right reasons.

Do it from your heart, because when you come from a place of pure authenticity, when you come from a place of

‘how can I use these funds to better serve others’

and its not from a place of selfish…from a place of greed – or a place of lack.

And thinking that other people should miss out so you should have more.

Then Love will find a way.  Everything else; every time you come up with an excuse, it’s because you’re not living it.  You’re not making a decision from your true self.

Every time you try and justify a decision or a point that you don’t think is going to work.  It’s simply because you’re not coming from a pace of love.  It’s simply because you’re not coming from a place of true self.  It’s simply because you’re not listening to your heart and your inner self.

But maybe listen to the universe and say “You know what. I know there is a reason that this is going to work.  And I’m going to make sure that it actually happens.”  Take heed to that message.

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You have $86,400 in your bank account and someone stole $30 from you.

Would you be so upset that you would throw all the remaining $86,370 away.

In the hope of getting back at the person who took your 30 bucks?

Or spending more and more of your remaining money just to get back that $30. 

To make it that way it was.

Or would you let it go. 

Acknowledge that they ‘had their reasons’.  And move on?

In the understanding that you no longer control that $30.  And you still control and can choose what to do with the remaining $86,370.

We all have 86,400 seconds in every day.

Don’t let someone’s negative 30 seconds ruin the rest of your 86,370 seconds.

Those 30 seconds have gone.  Your whole day (and life) is ahead of you.

Why am I standing here with a bag?  It’s a normal kind of a rolly overhead luggage bag, pretty normal. Even has a little red ribbon on it that my daughter has put on it so I don’t lose it when I’m at the airport in a couple of weeks.

What is it about bags?

I think a lot of us in life carry a bag around ALL THE TIME.  Consciously or unconsciously, we’re always think we need to look after our baggage.  

And I want to give you the example of when you’re travel travelling somewhere on a plane.  You know, it’s a bit like life.  You spend time loading up your bags.

• You’re loading them up with stories,
• loading them up with past experiences,
• loading them up with things that are relevant to your map of the world.
• Loading them up with stuff and then we cart it around.

Ohh, it’s so heavy and we’ve got to carry it ourselves.

Other times, there are wheels and we’re wheeling it around because it’s easier that way to carry our baggage.  And then when we get to the airport, the people at check-in say

“Excuse me sir.  Can I take your baggage?”  

And often we don’t want to give it away.  We want to keep the baggage because our baggage is important to us.

• It’s got all our excuses in it.
• It’s got all that justification and reasons in it.
• It’s got things that we need so we can justify to keep carrying our baggage.

“No thank you ma’am.  I’m going to carry it on board.”  

“Are you sure you don’t want to check it in Sir?   You’re sure you don’t want us to take your baggage away?  Put it somewhere else where you can’t see it so you can just forget about it?”

“No. I want to hold on to my excuses – I mean baggage.”  

So we take our baggage.  We go up the escalators – we go through security.  Sometimes other people may want to check our bags for security reasons.

They say “You know we want to make sure that you’re safe and we want to make sure that the people around you are safe.  We want to check inside your bags that there isn’t anything dangerous that can hurt other people.”  

Some of us can accept that, some of us get a little bit confronted.

“Why do you want to check my stuff?  I’ m fine.  I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone.”  

And then we grab our bag and we wheel it away.  We get on the plane and we’re sitting down.  And again the stewardess is on board and will say

“Please sir, you need to get rid of your baggage.  Please put it in the overhead locker.”  

“But I want to keep my baggage.  I want to hold on to my baggage.”

Then the announce is made and we hear “For your safety and the safety of others, please secure your baggage in a safe location.”  

And even then, we might not be able to help ourselves.

We’re going to pull out stuff from our bag because it’s so important to us that we have to have those baggage contents, we have to have those stories with us all the time.

So whilst we get rid of this bag, we might be left with a smaller bag that we’ll keep right near us.  Another bag that we can see, we can touch at any time that we’re travelling.  We’ve still got a little piece of baggage.

How many things in life are a little bit like this?

How many things in life for you revolve around baggage?  How much are you carrying around?  How much are you holding on to, telling yourself that you don’t want to hurt yourself or anyone else.

But maybe that bag is so big and heavy that when that bag hits someone, it will only hurt them.  And if you drop the bag on yourself you will hurt yourself too.

Look at how much baggage you’re carting around.  See what you can jettison.

Travel light, travel with purpose. 

If you want your child to come out of their youth sports experience a winner (feeling good about themselves and having a healthy attitude towards sports), then they need your help!  Their sport experience will serve as a positive model for them to follow as they approach other challenges and obstacles throughout life.

1. UNDERSTAND YOUR CHILD’S COMPETITION IS THEIR MOST VALUABLE TRAINING PARTNER

When defined the right way, competition in youth sports is both good and healthy and teaches children a variety of important life skills. The word “compete” comes from the Latin words “com” and “petere” which mean together and seeking respectively. The true definition of competition is a seeking together where your opponent is your partner, not the enemy!  Your child should never be taught to view his/her opponent as the “bad guy”, the enemy or someone to be hated and “destroyed”. Instead, talk to/make friends with parents of your child’s opponent. Root for great performances, good plays, not just for the winner!

2. ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO COMPETE AGAINST HIM/HERSELF

The ultimate goal of the sport experience is to challenge oneself and continually improve. Unfortunately, judging improvement by winning and losing is both an unfair and inaccurate measure. When a child performs to their potential and loses, it is criminal to focus on the outcome and become critical. If a child plays their very best and loses, you need to help them feel like a winner! Similarly, when a child or team performs far below their potential but wins, this is not cause to feel like a winner. Help your child make this important separation between success and failure and winning and losing.

3. BE SUPPORTIVE, DON’T COACH!

Your role on the team is as a Support player with a capital S! You need to be your child’s best fan. unconditionally! Leave the coaching and instruction to the coach. Provide encouragement, support, empathy, transportation, money, help with fund-raisers, etc., but… do not coach!   The last thing your child needs and wants to hear from you after a disappointing performance or loss is what they did technically or strategically wrong.

4. HELP MAKE THE SPORT FUN FOR YOUR CHILD

It’s a time proven principle of peak performance that the more fun an athlete is having, the more they will learn and the better they will perform. Fun must be present for peak performance to happen at every level of sports from youth to world class competitor! When a child stops having fun and begins to dread practice or competition, it’s time for you as a parent to become concerned! Why is your child participating in the sport? Are they doing it because they want to, for THEM, or because of YOU?  It is quite normal and healthy to want your child to excel and be as successful as possible. But, you cannot make this happen by pressuring them with your expectations or by using guilt or bribery to keep them involved.

5. YOUR CHILD IS NOT THEIR PERFORMANCE – LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY

Do not equate your child’s self-worth and lovability with their performance. The most tragic and damaging mistake I see parents continually make is punishing a child for a bad performance by withdrawing emotionally from them. A child loses a race, strikes out or misses and easy shot on goal and the parent responds with disgust, anger and withdrawal of love and approval.  One thing we all want as children and never stop wanting is to be loved and accepted, and to have our parents feel good about what we do. This is how self-esteem gets established. When your interactions with your child make them feel good about themselves, they will, in turn, learn to treat themselves this very same way.

6. TEACH YOUR CHILD THE GIFT OF FAILURE

If you really want your child to be as happy and as successful as possible in everything that they do, then teach them how to fail! The most successful people in and out of sports do two things differently than everyone else. First, they are more willing to take risks and therefore fail more frequently. Second, they use their failures in a positive way as a source of motivation and feedback to improve.   Teach your child how to view setbacks, mistakes and risk-taking positively and you’ll have given them the key to a lifetime of success. Failure is the perfect stepping stone to success.

Money is any item or verifiable record that is generally accepted as payment for goods and services and repayment of debts in a particular country or socio-economic context.

However, money doesn’t have any inherent value.

It is simply pieces of paper  – or numbers on a computer screen.   

A car has value because it can help you get to where you need to go. Water has a value because it has a use; if you don’t drink enough of it you will die.

Money has no more use than any other piece of paper until, as a country and an economy, we assign value to it.  Now – it didn’t always work this way. 

In the past money was in the form of coins, generally composed of precious metals such as gold and silver.  The value of the coins was roughly based on the value of the metals they contained, because you could always melt the coins down and use the metal for other purposes.  Until a few decades ago paper money in many Western countries was based on the gold standard or silver standard or some combination of the two.

Many of you have heard me say this over and over again.  But here it is:

It’s NOT the money we want – but rather what money can provide us.

Money – well the bits of paper and some coins – is really a tool used for bartering.  Or exchanging value.  The use of barter-like methods may date back to at least 100,000 years ago, though there is no evidence of a society or economy that relied primarily on barter.  Bartering really only came about to facilitate value exchange between strangers or different communities.

Many cultures around the world though, eventually developed the use of some sort of commodity money.  That means money that was linked to a commodity or a tangible thing. 

The Mesopotamian shekel (circa 3000 BC) was a unit of weight, and relied on the mass of something like 160 grains of barley. 

Societies in the Americas, Asia, Africa and Australia used shell money – often, the shells of the cowry).  According to Herodotus, the Lydians were the first people to introduce the use of gold and silver coins and it is though that the first stamped coins were minted around 650–600 BC.  Further studies indicate that the Song Dynasty introduced the world’s earliest paper money.

The system of commodity money eventually evolved into a system of representative money.  This occurred because gold and silver merchants or banks would issue receipts to their depositors – redeemable for the commodity money deposited.  So rather than having to cart around the actual commodity money – of gold, silver, cloth, salt, shells, etc – these items were ‘represented’ by a receipt.

Eventually, these receipts became accepted as a means of payment and were used as money.  Hence these receipts were representing the commodity.  And was the first, real instance of using paper as means of representing value exchange.

These receipts then become more elaborate and are now recognised as Paper money or banknotes.

Now, this was all based on moving from commodity money to representative money.  Then in 1971 President Nixon announced that the United States would no longer exchange dollars for gold and the ‘gold standard’ of the representative system ceased.

Modern currency is now referred to in economic circles as Fiat money.  This is where is gets really interesting.

What started out as commodity money become representative money (all used for trading or bartering).  The latter as it was simply too impractical to cart around carts of oxen to acquire goods or services.

And if these representative money, which was then based on the value of Gold as the representative, has ceased.  How was money valued??

Fiat money or fiat currency is money whose value is not derived from any intrinsic value.  Or from any guarantee that it can be converted into a valuable commodity (such as gold).  Instead, it has value only by government order (a “fiat”).

So how does a ten-dollar note have value and some other pieces of paper do not?  It’s simple:

Money is good with a limited supply and there is a demand for it because people want it.

The reason I want money is so I can use my money to get goods and services from others.  They can then use that money to purchase the goods and services they want.  And so on.  Goods and services are what ultimately matter in the economy.

Money that has no inherent value.  The value of money is called into being rather than being inherent in and of itself.

Money has value because people believe that they will be able to exchange this money for goods and services in the future.  This belief will persist so long as people do not fear future inflation or the failure of the issuing agency and its government.

Some interesting origins about money words:

Fee – This word comes from the German word for cattle, vieh.

Shell out – The use of shells as currency among Americans, Polynesians and later, the European colonists, led to the phrase “shell out,” meaning “to pay.”

Salary – At one point, Roman soldiers were paid part of their wages in salt. The Latin word for “salt” is salarium.

Dollar – A count in a Czechoslovakian town called Jachymov started minting silver coins in 1519. The coins were known as talergroschen, which was eventually shortened to talers.  Many nations have currency named for some variation of the word taler, including the word “dollar.”

Your Money Can Also Become History – Yep, A Thing Of The Past…UNLESS

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Understand History Sure – And NOW Look Forward.

Like it or not…This is the race that stops the nation.  An annual event that is almost as big as New Year’s celebration in Australia.  I’ve been to the Melbourne Cup.  Stood in the rain (one year) and watched the GeesGees go round and round.

The spectacle of the fashion, the drunk guys & girls and just forgetting about most other things and hanging out with some friends.

And looking back I reckon there are a FIVE lessons I’ve learned that I’d love to share.

1. Everyone has an opinion but not everyone should be listened to.

How many people do you know – friends or even media personalities – all keen to give you their ‘hot tips’.  And will be only to willing to share with you about past winnings.  And rarely declare the losses they’ve made.

Friends and strangers alike can potentially be harmful when it comes to your money decisions.  The Melbourne Cup is one of the classic examples of when you shouldn’t be following big talkers, people who may have bet well once or people who you overhear as you queue up to buy a drink.

Everyone has an opinion – sure.  But how many have a proven track record?  How many are enjoying the lifestyle because of experience.  And because they are willing to share the pitfalls and challenges with you – so you can avoid them.  Rather than trying to highlight the short-cuts to obtaining good results.  Make sure you seek opinions from experts, not amateurs and big talkers.

2. Dream big but dream realistically.

We would all love to win the Melbourne Cup sweep. That trifecta and just live it up.  We just need to recognise that it is still a gamble and not an investment.  Why gamble your financial well-being when you can make a series of little prudent steps, checking for approaching storms in order to gain reliable, stable, predictable returns?.

The Melbourne Cup is a fun day out indeed; and there is nothing wrong with putting a small amount of money on the line and having a bit of fun.  But future proof your life through investing, not gambling. And if you want to gamble, make it a small gamble.

Believing you can “make it” on one horse – on one single investment and one time – is just a gamble.  And nothing more.  Be prudent.  Have a structure or a plan.  Dream big and plan using realistic and measurable steps.

3. The favourite isn’t always the winner.

Sometimes we think the best strategy is to follow the crowd.  But what is the best strategy?  What may have worked for you in the past may not work for you now.  And the best plan can be different from the ‘right ‘ plan.

We feel safe if we do what everyone else is doing.  But often the greatest outcomes are from doing  our own research, thinking for ourselves, obtaining our own advice and pursuing our own path.  Don’t try and keep up with the guys in the fancy suit.  Or buy that dress to look better than whats-her-name.

I know that when it comes to investing, most of us are hard-wired to make all the wrong calls, to invest more when the markets are going up, rather than capitalising on profits and waiting until the market falls before investing further.

This is especially true on Melbourne Cup day, when no one can predict the winner!  The favourite is never going to make you as much money as backing a horse that is less popular (if it comes in!)

4. Do your homework before investing.

In the heat of Melbourne Cup excitement, you might get distracted into betting your money on a horse whose name your fancy, or your friends are choosing.

While no one has a crystal ball.  Professional punters do their homework, study the form guide, use their information advantage to make the best decisions they can.  So, act like a professional punter.  Get informed & take advice from the experts.  Especially in regards to your financial future.

5. Know Your Limits.  Enjoy Tomorrow Without A Hangover.

The Melbourne Cup can expose our weaknesses.  The desire for the ‘quick fix’ and to extend ourselves over and above our limits.  Before you know it – you’re borrowing money because you’ve run out.  To bet on that ‘sure thing’.  You’ve lost focus because of all the champagne – but decided another glass (or bottle) will fix everything.

Don’t endanger your lifestyle goals and those of the people you love.  Because you don’t know (or care about) your limits.  Have a stop-loss.  A maximum investment position.  See it through.  Be safe so that not only can you ‘go again’ later – but you can wake up tomorrow without the embarrassment and need for a panadol.

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